


Hallucinations

by hamilton_fanatic1776



Category: Hamilton - Miranda, Turn (TV 2014)
Genre: American Revolution, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hallucinations, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-11
Packaged: 2019-09-16 04:21:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16946901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hamilton_fanatic1776/pseuds/hamilton_fanatic1776
Summary: John Laurens has PTSD flashbacks and hallucinations and attempts suicide, but his brothers' in arms are there when he needs them most.





	Hallucinations

**Author's Note:**

> So I did kind of a Hamilton/TURN crossover thing and I really like it. The idea and part of it came from an RP me and a friend are doing as well. John Laurens is the only Hamilton character in this one. Also I love Andre dearly but he had to be an ass in this one so...that happened.

John Laurens was running through the woods, the flashbacks immediately coming back. The gunshots, British soldiers closing in, the screaming, all of it flooded back into his mind. He started having visual and auditory hallucinations. He froze "seeing" the soldier in front of him that had shot him and backed away slowly. "Don't do this...please don't do this...I'm too young to die!"

Andre sneered and shot near his feet. "You'll be dead soon, John Anthony Laurens. But I won't kill you...you'll be hanged for treason against the Crown."

John's eyes widened and he shook his head. "You can't do that...YOU CAN'T DO THAT!"

Andre smirked horribly. "Oh we can. And we will. It would have been easier on you if you would have just been good colonists and behaved when your mother country told you to stop rebelling. Now you're being punished."

John kept shaking his head and picked up a sharp stick, throwing it at Andre. "We're going to win this! We'r-"

The stick passed through him causing him to laugh. "You can't hurt me. I'm in your head, John. And you know the only way to get me out..." he held out his pistol to him.

John stared at him terrified. "No...no...I'm not going to do that, you're crazy!"

Andre watched with sick excitement. “No John, you’re crazy. Insane. You’re better off dead. So make it easy on yourself and take the pistol.”

Tears spilled down his freckled cheeks as he pulled out the pistol in his pocket. John had thankfully used the last bullet back in those other woods but he didn't remember that. He held it to the side of his head and squeezed his eyes shut, tears running down his freckled cheeks. He put his finger on the trigger...

Andre's grin grew. "Come on...just pull it already!"

John screamed in much distress. "STOP IT!"

Andre laughed. "Make me then!"

John's mind snapped as he pulled the trigger.

Captain Benjamin Tallmadge ran through the woods searching for the lost soldier against Washington’s orders. “JOHN ANTHONY LAURENS!”

John dropped the gun and stood frozen, but trembling more than he ever had. “Andre just leave me alone…”

Benjamin ran over and grabbed his shoulders nearly panting. “JOHN!”

John didn’t look up at him. He was still stuck in his own head. “Just...just make it stop...please just make it stop…”

Andre whispered to him. “I told you. Only you can do that, Laurens. Reload and finish what you started. Coward.”

John knelt down in the wet grass and twigs and pulled a bullet from his overcoat pocket. He looked at it with bloodshot and teary eyes before loading it into the chamber. “I’m not a coward…”

Benjamin furrowed his eyebrows and knelt down with him. “I never said you were a coward…”

John held the pistol to the side of his head again and closed his eyes. “Goodbye, Andre. You sick motherfucker…”

Benjamin went wide eyed and snatched it from him before he pulled the trigger. He quickly unloaded it and chucked it across the forest before grabbing his arms and pulling him up. “I’m taking you to General Washington, now.”

Andre chuckled and shook his head. “Can’t even commit to death. Pathetic.”

John screeched in protest and tried to pull away from Ben. “I’M NOT PATHETIC! I CAN PROVE IT!”

Benjamin kept a firm hold on the struggling soldier and pulled him back to camp and to Washington’s tent. “Sir?”

George Washington, in the middle of a talk with the Marquis de Lafayette stood up slightly irritated. “Captain Tallmadge I thought...well you’re here now. Come, sit.”

Benjamin winced a small bit as John screeched into his ear. “John Laurens has...lost his mind. Screaming about Andre and tried to kill himself, sir.”

Washington grit his teeth a small bit as Lafayette was around and they really needed help from the French. This didn’t look too good on their part. “Take him to the doctor, there’s nothing I can do for him.”

Lafayette stood up and walked over. “Let me talk to him for a moment.” He took John’s arm and steered him into an empty tent, sitting him down on a bed. “What’s going on, John?”

John hid in his knees, sobbing. "A-Andre...h-he wouldn't get out of my head...h-he said it was the only way..."

Lafayette laid a hand on his shoulder. “That’s not true. We need you here. You’re one of General Washington’s best soldiers. The French are here to help, but we can’t do everything.”

John shook his head and stayed in the uncomfortable position. “I-I can’t...I-I can’t deal with this...h-he said I was g-going to be hanged for treason a-anyway...a shot t-to the head is so much faster and far less agonizing…”

Lafayette gently grabbed his chin and tipped his head back to look at him. “You’re not going to be hanged, John. We’re going to win this war. But we need you on our side right now. I need you to trust me.”

John looked up at him and wiped his eyes on his overcoat sleeve sniffling. “O-Okay...I’ll try…”

Lafayette smiled gently and pulled him into a hug. “Good. I’m going to be keeping an eye on you to make sure you don’t do that again okay? We can’t lose you.”

John nodded and hugged him back, letting a fresh set of tears run down his face. “Merci, Lafayette.”

“De rien, John,” Lafayette replied. “If you need anything, you can come talk to me.” He led him back outside and gave him a pat on the back. “Go to sleep. You’re exhausted. I can tell.”

John wiped his eyes again and walked off to his own tent to get some much needed sleep.


End file.
